Risk and the life I want...

The life I want, may not be the life I am living.

The dreams I have seen, may not be, for now, alive.

To get it, I must risk a lot! Life as I know it, dreams as I see them.

Everything.


The life that I want, the dreams I have seen.

Do I want them enough?

enough to risk it all?

all?


I must risk it all to find out the answers...

but, do I risk it all?

all?

...

---

"...न हो मरना, तो जीने का मज़ा क्या?" - मिर्ज़ा ग़ालिब

"...but those who do not observe the impulse of their own minds must, of necessity be unhappy." - The Meditations, Marcus Aurelius.

---


"हवस को है निशाते-कार क्या-क्या| न हो मरना, तो जीने का मज़ा क्या?" - मिर्ज़ा ग़ालिब

"Do wrong to thyself, do wrong to thyself, my soul; but later thou wilt no longer have the opportunity of respecting and honoring thyself. For every man has but one life. But yours is nearly finished, though in it you had no regard for yourself, but placed thy felicity in the souls of others... But those who do not observe the impulses of their own minds must of necessity by unhappy."  - The Meditations, Marcus Aurelius.



S.

Love Aaj Kal : Black Tea is better than Black Coffee.

Watch Saif Ali Khan "drink" his black tea. Turban and attitude firmly in place - all so cool!. Then you see him "act" as he drinks his black coffee and flexes his biceps - aargh! weak man weak!.

Love Aaj Kal

I happened to catch a show last night. A bunch of beer-damp, un-fed office mates and me (Yeah! I decided to bunk-dump the depressing delivery-on-time scene and dragged them along for the flick). The film, I kinda liked it. The other guys ummm... didn't. Here's the bits and pieces of the flick that I picked up.

The good bits:

It's very fresh, charming in bits. The time fracture is nice. The whole "tell a tale in 2 minutes then tell it again in 2 hours" presentation is neat too (don't worry if you don't get this line till after you've seen the flick).

You'd've seen it all before. All the thingies, the situations, the sexless virgin, the mock innocence, the story, the sardar stereotypes, everything - repeat telecast - but, but, but, the approach here is quiet new and fast. That is how it engaged me. I think that is the strength of the film. One by one, it takes the most cliched situations ever on the desi film and turns it into a self-refferential, pattern-breaking moment. Esp. the climax. Neat.

Deepika Padukone is pretty natural in most of the talky bits. She is a little out of depth, unsure of her role, out of character in those dancy, just-look-at-the-camera-and-smile parts. Both, Saif and Deepika throw a fake laugh or two, but, it's easily forgiven.

Saif's surd-attitude and Deepika's calm-contemporary-hip is an engaging act all in all.

The umm... okay bits:

The film fails where the new age Saif tries too hard to be charming (probably another self reference - who knows!). The initial break-up scene was so cool in the trailers, but, it's a lost moment in the film. Initially, I loved it when the film told a 30-40 minute tale in about 2 minutes in the beginning (including the meet cute - "I don't want to pile up..."), but, soon enough there is a 5 minute drag of a scene with Rishi Kapoor. The film totally lost its pace there. It picks up again in a few minutes and maintains this uneven pace throughout. Fast and engaing, then a drag, again fast, engaging, again a drag - it could've been like a few minutes shorter and it would've been like a few notches nicer.

At times the performances were a let down. The old-timer-cute-girl act by the actress with no name was a turn off.

Here's the best "okay" bit: The old-surd Saif, sips his black tea with elan, his act is better, more confident, more polished. On the other hand, the new-bicep-ey Saif, "appears" to be sipping his black coffee (It's Americano - espresso "stretched" with hot water - so you get a mug full of bitter liquid), you can see the sham, his act is scratchy, good in parts, bad in parts and not well etched at all. It looks like Saif was saying: "Black Tea is better than Black Coffee." - old vs. new.

The bad bits:

Neetu Singh is such a cliche! I think the scene would've been nicer if we'd only get a hint of the real-life love: "Veer singh enters his house, hangs his coat and heads to the chair announcing his presence. We see female hands preparing two cups of black tea. Veer Singh smiles - END"

At times, the film appeared bold enough to just say what it had to, but, at others it chickend out, taking its audience for retards, it started explaining everything. Looked like someone was really interfering with the director's work. This uneven-ness is what hurts the film the most. I kinda hoped for a repeat act from the guy who did "Jab We Met", but, I guess, two in a row is not an easy task.

Still, all said and done, the film is heads and shoulders above the rest of the desi rom-com mud-muck.

Try it. You just might like it. My beer-damp office-mates (with due-respect) may beg to differ...  ;)

:)

.

S.

The irony of cinema or How I was saved from Happy Feet that couldn't dance

Okay. This could be risky, tricky. Confessions always are.

I have never told anyone that I do not like Happy Feet.

I have never told anyone that I actually hate Happy Feet.

It's like the Harry Potter films, looks good but is fundamentally cheap, a yawn is more interesting than it. I mean the documentary - The march of the penguins, from which Happy feet was "inspired" - was far more engaging. A documentary is more engaging than an animation. Not only its a compliment to the documentary, it's a tight slap on the perfect pathetica that the animation was. It won a political oscar, but, honestly each of its competitors were far more eligible. To its credit (just like the HP filmografia), the CGI was great. Still, Happy Feet was lame. It could not dance.

Enough Happy Feet bashing. This post is a confession, not a complaint.

I got chatty with Ms G at the office yesterday evening. We ended up talking about movies (as I invariably end up doing when talking to any one for any length of time). Harry Potter and the curse of the boring flick came up. From there we moved on to other films that we found boring...and I confessed about 'it'.

It was supposed to be a Lord Of the Rings night, a great-ey late-ey date-ey night. A gaggle of good men held cold beers and conversation, waiting for other geese to join in. Others came and flew out too fast. A few kids were left behind, bouncing around, playing with toys. I was one of them. Somehow a Happy Feet dvd replaced the LOTR extra giant DVD collective. A few girls chuckled how they really liked Happy Feet (they might as well've liked Harry Potter movies, I think some of them do. I am sorry. I am sorry. I am sorry).

To my embarassment, I joined in. I said, not only loudly, but clearly too, that Happy Feet was nice, in fact I really liked it (In reality, I had never been able to finish the whole movie). G giggled. Some of them chimed the dialogue as it got said on screen. All this while I was thinking about the long night ahead. I was already sleepy with boredom and did not want to embarass myself by falling asleep watching a movie that I had so vocally advocated a few minutes ago. Dunno why I said I liked it. Was I trying to be nice? polite? non-comittal? testing the waters? being an ass? (probably all of them?) - can't say. Everyone there was older, wiser and nicer that me. All I remember is that I was feeling intimidated - with partial loss of judgement and total loss of intestinal fortitude.

So anyway, Happy feet on screen, me feeling sleepy, Ms G giggling. The night was almost going to be a disaster when something-serendipity happened. An idea exchange took place. A conversation started. Mr A switched off the flick, sipped on cold gold, sat on a chair and started saving me - one idea at a time.

I have never thought of conversations or exchange of ideas with the same aesthetic as I have thought of flims, stories, plays and music. It was the second time in as many weeks that I realized, I should've thought of conversations as I think of films, stories, plays and music. Eyes wide open, we gibbered, gabbered, gamed, word volleys, idea knock outs, penalty stroke repartee - drinks got sipped and the night was saved. I was saved and happily so.

I learnt two things that night:

1. Conversations are art too. Not all, but some. When they are, it totally awesome.

2. Penguins do it with beaks in Happy Feet (it's crazy, you should see it - Mr Dancing Penguin finally getting some action out of Ms Singing Penguin - all beaks and bad breath)

Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize for lying. I was not being disrespectful or cheeky or pretentious or phony. I was scared and overwhelmed by the presence of a few good men (of both the sexes).

In our chatty last evening, Ms G pointed out that probably, "that" night was not the right gathering for a film like LOTR. My opinions of LOTR not withstanding, what struck me was the irony.

G reminded me of the irony of cinema - there is no "right" gathering for a film, even with dancy penguins in it. It is all in something-serendipity. It happens over the worst films and doesn't happen with the best ones.

Watching a film is a very personal experience. Alone, in the dark, mesmerized by the moving images. I've never had the happy-happenstance of having had someone who could see it happening alongside me. Its rare to find one who actually feels a film the same way as you, rarer to have a gathering collect, gawk at it, then talk of it. And still, the elusive-search continues...

Unlike cinema, it's irony is real.

.

.

.

P.S: This post is not there to offend, but to amend-emend. I am sorry if you feel hurt, you can probably hurt me back by bothering me in the middle of a nice film. I promise I will endure the torture.

Harry Potter and the hourglass of conversations

1. The film adaptation of The half blood prince is awesome.
2. The film adaptation of The half blood prince is not awesome.
3. There is this nifty little hourglass that reminded me of similar conversations.

I saw the film yesterday, after not wanting to see it pretty bad. I did not see the fifth one at all. Sumukh took me to this one and hence this post.

I hate the Harry Potter films, because they are dumb dumb dumb films. There is no drama, no sense of realism, only a cheap circus like quality where the camera throws the next specacle at you. The novels were not like that. They were heartfelt, inventive, realistic, playful, had genuine bits of drama, suspense and were masterpieces of plotting (and for the most part story telling). The films? zilch. I wonder if anyone who has never read the novels (or heard about Harry Potter) would actually understand what was going on in any of those films?

JK Rowling also appears to be massively well read! In contrast, each of the films were led by an almost mediocre director (I know Chris Columbus could be good and inventive etc, but he gave nothing to those first two films. Ditto Cuarón) who puts in almost no effort in translating the film to screen. All the HP films are a very literal line by line rendering of their novels. The lines that do not fit the time/budget are not translated to screen. Simple. There's probably an excel sheet somewhere behind the scenes going: line 1 - OK, line 2 - OK, line 3 - OUT...

I am very fond of quoting Steve Jobs in such cases, because his words really hit the mark: "The problem is that they have no taste... What that means is that they don't think of original ideas and they don't bring much culture to their products... I mean propotionally spaced fonts come from typesetting and beautiful books, if it hadn't been for the mac these would not have been there..."

See? These films are there, gaudy, glossy with pseudo hot Emma Watson in it, but they have no idea of what a film can be, no sense of drama, no direction. No Taste. No culture. They look like they are directed (in part) by the SFX heads (this may justify the use of less than accomplished directors) and championed by uncultivated accountant-managers. The director is conspicuous by his/her absence.

But this time it was a little different. I am going to make an exception for Harry Potter & the half blood prince and say that I actually enjoyed it!

Don't get me wrong, what I said above still holds true. It's a sucky movie, true to its traditions.

What got me hooked this time was all the visual appeal. I mean you've got to see this one to understand what I mean. It looks bloody gorgeous! I was in love with each and every one of those frames of filthy filmaking that were paraded naked in front of me. WOW! Ah! heart breakingly beautiful to look at! What a waste that so much beauty was shed on such a shitty flick.

The Quidditch matches,finally look like sports coverage on TV (tho they are still not half as exciting to watch as the ones that Rowling wrote). The way Hogwarts was rendered from within, the way Ron's Burrow was rendered from within (tho only for a painfully short sequence in the beginning), the way the pensive worked - beautiful! The production design/art direction/sfx departments have far exceeded themselves in this one. I cannot praise these qualities in the film enough.

Still, its a bad film. The novel starts with a BANG, the movies starts with a whimper. The novel ends with a louder BANG! The movie ends up taking a poop. Hermione, Ron were of no importance to the film at all. Mr Malfoy Jr. looked sinister but just opened a cupboard in the end. (oooh! be scared I am going to open the dooor! oooooh! loook there is nothing inside! ooooh! hear the eerie music! ooooh! the cupboard looks really pretty). Helena Bonham Carter is completely wasted in the film (compare this with her awesome evil witch act in Big Fish)...and the list of wasted opportunities goes on...

Please watch this film. Please watch it. It will make you wish that there be better Harry Potter films in this world. A truly good book deserves a truly good film.

Finally, a singular point where I connected with the film. There is this hourglass with Prof. Slughorn, a peculiar one that brought back nice memories of a few nightfuls of conversations. The hourglass would go slow if the conversation was interesting and it would go fast if it was boring. You could have long interesting conversations for a long interesting time. Harry/Tom Riddle "ting" the hour glass and with each ting I tingled with conversations. I feel happy to I have had a Dumbledore full of mentors with awesome conversations to go with around me.

Nice hourglass.

:)

S.

on Woody Allen

He has an uncanny ability to be right about all the wrong things. Makes me laugh about things I should be crying on. The one (and the only memorable one) to successfully break the fourth wall in a film! There's almost no better pick-me-up than an Allen film when you are low. More so because, it picks you up and still leaves you depressed (as in Annie Hall). Perfect Cocaine, helps you and harms you. :)

I just saw Annie Hall again. I do not know what to say, I am feeling good and bad at the same time. Here, let me paraphrase:

Alvy and Annie shake hands and kiss each other friendly like.  Annie crosses
the street, Alvy watching her go.  Then he turns, and slowly walks down the
street off screen.  His voice is heard over the scene:

					ALVY'S VOICE-OVER
			After that it got pretty late.  And we
			both hadda go, but it was great seeing
			Annie again, right?  I realized what a
			terrific person she was and-and how much
			fun it was just knowing her and I-I
			thought of that old joke, you know, this-
			this-this guy goes to a psychiatrist and
			says, "Doc, uh, my brother's crazy.  He
			thinks he's a chicken." And, uh, the
			doctor says, "Well, why don't you turn
			him in?" And the guy says, "I would, but
			I need the eggs." Well, I guess that's
			pretty much how how I feet about
			relationships.  You know, they're totally
			irrational and crazy and absurd and ...
			but, uh, I guess we keep goin' through it
			because, uh, most of us need the eggs.

					THE END

beautiful!

digital

To get things done &
To be some where
You go all the way or
It goes no where

Halfway there
Is the middle of no where
Almost there is
Neither here nor there

I just started
And this is in progress
Neither here nor there
In the middle of no where

'Here' is a zero
'There' is a one
And it's all you need
To get things done

redirection

I do not want to close this just yet.
Not till I know all the effects of this vs. that

Till that time though...

I have migrated to Wordpress.

visit: http://shauryashaurya.wordpress.com/

please update your favorites.

cheers!

:):):)

...and a director must

A director must be able to write:

"We're willing to write for other people but we wouldn't direct a script written by somebody else...writing a script takes a few weeks, sometimes a few months. Directing a film can take up to two years of our lives. So it better be worth it!" - Ethan Coen

"...director who realizes somebody else's screenplay without being involved in it becomes a mere illustrator, resulting in dead and monotonous films" - Andrei Tarkovsky

...but, a director must always think in images (and draw and animate!):

"We like telling stories. But we don't see the writing as the best form to do that. It's just a step. We really think in terms of images." - Joel Coen

"...I would advise any future filmmaker to take a stab at animation...when you work in animation you control everything and do everything yourself: costumes, sets, lightning, framing and even, in a way, actor direction" - Jean-Pierre Jeunet

"When you're sent something and read it, either you can see it while you read it, or you can't." -
Steven Soderbergh

"It is not a just image, it is just an image" - Jean Luc Goddard

"I dream for a living." - Steven Spielberg

also, a director should be able to shoot and edit (and record sound) :

"The film of tomorrow will not be directed by civil servants of the camera, but by artists for whom shooting a film constitutes a wonderful and thrilling adventure." - Francois Truffaut

"I'm obsessed by the camera" - Bernardo Bertolucci

"What is drama but life with the dull bits cut out." - Alfred Hitchcock

"Photography is truth. The cinema is truth twenty-four times per second." - Jean-Luc Godard

"...to film the unspoken" - Claude Sautet

A director may steal:

"...one could say that the tribute is borrowing and then copying is theft. For me, only theft is justifiable. If it's necessary, one should never hesitate; every filmmaker does it"- Pedro Almodovar

"I steal from every movie ever made." - Quentin Tarantino

"Self-plagiarism is style." - Alfred Hitchcock

but, the director better know what he is talking about:

"I think the duty of a filmmaker is to tell the story he wants to tell, which means that you have to know what the hell you're talking about." - Martin Scorsese

"I'm a storyteller - that's the chief function of a director. And they're moving pictures, let's make 'em move!" - Howard Hawks

"If it can be written, or thought, it can be filmed." - Stanley Kubrick

and although he may not know a lot else:

"...its a tension between knowing exactly what you want or being able to change it according to the circumstances..." - Martin Scorsese

"The biggest danger I would warn any future filmmaker about is to think that you know everything about cinema." - Woody Allen

"I don't think there's any artist of any value who doesn't doubt what they're doing." - Francis Ford Coppola

"...when I get on the set, I don't know anything." - Woody Allen

he should still be a know-it-all:

"The profession of film director can and should be such a high and precious one; that no man aspiring to it can disregard any knowledge that will make him a better film director or human being." - Sergei Eisenstein

A director must think different different different:

"I failed to make the chess team because of my height." - Woody Allen

"The concept of absurdity is something I'm attracted to." - David Lynch

"A story should have a beginning, a middle, and an end... but not necessarily in that order." - Jean-Luc Godard

"Why pay a dollar for a bookmark? Why not use the dollar for a bookmark?" - Steven Spielberg

"Thank God I'm an atheist." - Luis Bunuel

and whatever happens, a director must keep trying trying trying:

"I associate my motion picture career more with being unhappy and scared, or being under the gun, than with anything pleasant." - Francis Ford Coppola

"To be or not to be. That's not really a question." - Jean-Luc Godard

"Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all." - Woody Allen

A director must always stay true to the self:

"All art is autobiographical. The pearl is the oyster's autobiography." - Federico Fellini

"As for me, well, I make films for myself" - Martin Scorsese

"Each time I view my work after a film is finished: I see only the mistakes" - Jean-Pierre Jeunet

"...it has to do with the way you tell that story..." - David Lynch

but then, when it's all there, the director must, in the end, lie:

"Lying is like alcoholism. You are always recovering." - Steven Soderbergh

"I have always preferred the reflection of the life to life itself." -Francois Truffaut

"Cinema is the most beautiful fraud in the world. " - Jean Luc Goddard

of a meet-cute, I never met

I want to write a love story
A tale I've never told
of a meet-cute, I never met
and a sex-rack too bold

I want to tell a tale
All the passions wild
of desires never done
and mistakes untold

I want to fib
but I know the lie
of a heart that speaks
around the waters too cold

CIRCLE

And all this time, the author kept apologizing for it all. He’d tell the truth and that would be good, but the truth was blasphemous and that would be bad.
Good for some, bad for some.

Good.
Bad.

God.
Devil.

God, Pure Good
Devil, Ah! Well…

You.

God did good. You were happy. God got popular. Devil got pissed.

Devil impersonated God and made a Devil of the God. The devil probably hired a PR agency to finish the job.

The new God setup a church and asked you to pray pray pray, for it was all suffering suffering sad. You did. Meanwhile the new Devil asked you to love love love and have a good time, for it wasn’t all that bad. You wondered.

Eventually, you stopped crying and started having a good time. The new Devil got popular. The new God got pissed.

God impersonated Devil and made a God of the Devil. The God also gave that same PR agency – free will.

The new Devil sang while you loved and lo! There were diseases for you that only monkeys could have before. You loved and you lost and you cried and you wept.

The God setup a church and asked you to save, help, heal everything, for it all did matter. You did. You wondered. Meanwhile the Devil asked you to eat, shit, fuck everything, for none of it mattered in the end. You wondered. You did.

Eventually, you may stop crying and start having a good time. The God gets popular. The Devil gets pissed.

More business for the PR agency where you work.
It’s called life-something isn’t it?

And all this time, the author kept apologizing for it all. He’d tell the truth and that would be good, but the truth was blasphemous and that would be bad.
Good for some, bad for some.

So, he’d apologize and do it all over again.
Good, bad, bad, good, bad, bad, good, good, bad, good, good, bad…It was his nature.

the Temp-Sample

we start in the middle of nowhere and this is where it will
all end too. There is a light in the window of the house
that is in the middle of nowhere. A shadow appears in the
window.

SHADOW
I have been sucking on stale donuts
all day. When will my misery end!!!

the house explodes! but the explosion cannot be seen from afar
as the the fog moves on! We see the hand of a man who walks up
to the remains of the house.

HAND
your misery ends when the monitor
is switched off and Alice walks
into the wonderland! GOOD BYE!

and that is how it ends...in the middle of no where.


....
I was trying a new scriptwriting service online and this is the temp-sample attempt I made while testing the features. Nope, not for me, I'd stick with Zhura for now... :)

The sound made by one

There's a peculiar habit I have. Whenever I read , I can't help writing down snatches of text that appeal to me. Not so much "quotable quotes" as "tasty text". I have several diaries full of such text now. If you read them, they appear like notes of a larger story - a celestial shaggy dog if you may, wet, sloppy, in your face and completely cryptic.
Speaking of cryptic shaggy dogs, I am always in awe of the Illuminatus! trilogy. Almost every other paragraph is a "tasty text" and most are too long to quote. Lately a single line from the book inspired an entire story out of me. I will post the story here in some time. For now here is another "tasty text" from the book:

How do we know whether the universe is getting bigger or the objects in it are getting smaller? You can't say that the universe is getting bigger in relation to anything outside it, because there isn't any outside for it to relate to. There isn't any outside. But if the universe doesn't have any out-side, then it goes on forever. Yeah, but, its in-side doesn't go on forever. How do you know it doesn't shithead? You're just playing with words, man.
- No I am not. The universe is the inside without an outside, the sound made by one.


...as I said...trippy!

A notable mention on #tweetcoding YAY!!!

post #twex I got really interesting in another experiment...

#tweetcoding was a kick ass code contest by Grant Skinner (thanks a lot @gskinner!)

prtcipnts hd 2 code sth. cool in ls thn 140 chrs!... and @machine501 setup an online compiler to showcase all the #tweetcoding going on... again thanks to @machine501 for making it so easy for me to follow it all up!
.
and now the results are out!!!

The Winners :
diagonal snake by @tomee6
Tunnel of Stripes by @piXelero (a personal favorite!)

The Runners-ups :
the drummer by @vectorcinco
Ghost Marquee by @dickwolf

Congratulations everyone! awesome work!!!

and there were some entries that got a Notable mention ...and My entry was amongst them:
The time-sketch by @shauryashaurya
happy happy - Wooohooo!!!!

To all the judges of the contest, thanks so much! This was really encouraging! :)

take a look at the #tweetcoding winners page.

1. Check out all of the #tweetcoding (compiled) entries online
2. the #tweetcoding rules
3. link to @gskinner's blog post on #tweetcoding
4. @gskinner says here that the next round should be in around next month: am eargely waiting!!!
   

S.

P.S. #twex analysis is still pending (my apologies!!! - sum dum projkts @ wrk I need to fin firs.) but results should be out next month! stay tuned :)

alluvial deposits

WOW! I had like four stories to write and no time.
(can't say how many times I have made this excuse, but I have still not figured a way to not give an excuse and get it done.)

The ideas came to my brain and left out the other way to mingle with the collective.
Like rivers rushing out to sea.
And now all I am left with are alluvial deposits...

These are real fertile, volatile deltas. There may be more stories germinating in these deposits, but they'd be closer to the sea and likelier to be washed away.

It may be this, there may be that, but the point in the mean time was - there was another January with a lot of stories in it, that never got told.

May the Gods accept the sacrifice (of these tales) and bless me with a better year ahead.

Stories giving birth to other stories, tales feeding tales...may the fabled ecosystems of imagination continue to thrive


:) :) :)

S.

Happy New Year!

Wish you a happy-shiny, shiny-happy new year.

by the way, here's a calendar just for you. Comment to this post, leave your email and I'll send a printable pdf to you. :)